Get More 'Yes!' From Anyone by Communicating Your Ideas This Way 👍
Issue #82: How to Influence Someone. A Small Phone Hack. Good Things Happen Gradually.
💡 Here are 3-tips to help you learn, grow, and be inspired this week!
🎓 Learn
Getting someone to say ‘Yes’ to our ideas or suggestions is not always easy, right? Whether it’s a friend, family member, or someone at work.
But, if we explain our idea in a clear and easy way, there’s a better chance they’ll agree with us.
I found a really easy method to share our ideas, suggestions, or requests in a way that makes others more likely to say ‘Yes’!
Want to know about it?
Here is the technique: Problem-Solution-Benefit
Problem: First, define a challenge, issue, pain point, or problem that you are addressing, one that your group shares.
Solution: Second, present a solution to the problem, spelling out the specific steps, process/ product, or method for remedying the problem.
Benefit: Finally, describe the benefits that adoption of your proposed solution will yield.
Here are a few examples of this method in practice
#1: You're interviewing someone for a job, trying to convince them to come to your company.
You will not only hone your skills in project management, but you will also have access to and influence with senior management [Benefit]. This job will have you define and implement our go-to-market plan, which means you will have a big impact inside and outside our firm [Opportunity]. I and the people you interviewed with hope you choose to work as part of our team [Solution].
#2: You want to get someone to do you a favor.
I need to rearrange two large bookcases since that would allow my office's new area rug to fit and allow for a clearer view of my big-screen TV [Problem]. Since I helped you move your new sofa up your stairs, I was hoping you could come over tonight to return the favor by helping me move these bookcases [Solution]. We can then enjoy watching the game better and have a drink [Benefit].
#3: You're going out for dinner with your significant other, and you want to convince them that your choice of restaurant is the right one.
While I know you suggested we go for Italian food, I hear that the menu at the Chinese restaurant just changed and that their chef just received a prestigious award [Opportunity]. What if we go to the Chinese restaurant tonight and make Italian food during the week [Solution]? This way, we can try out the new Chinese menu, and by cooking Italian at home, we can be guaranteed to have lots of leftovers which means we save money on lunches [Benefit].
Here are a few tips to practice this method
Use analogies: so they can connect and understand your ideas easily.
Offer consistent solutions: unique solutions make people a bit uneasy about saying ‘yes’; instead, show them how your solution is more popular and conventional.
Frame benefits in positive terms: instead of saying this solution has a 25% chance of failure, phrase it has a 75% chance of success.
Address the obstacles: if your friend goes to bed around 9pm, instead of suggesting that they meet for late dinner, suggest breakfast or brunch.
Tone down the perfectionism: have some room for others to contribute to your idea; if it’s too perfect, then people won’t like it because they can’t connect and contribute to your idea.
Here is an easy visual recap of this method
I learned this method in Matt Abrahams’ book, Think Faster, Talk Smarter: How to Speak Successfully When You’re Put on the Spot. Matt’s not just any expert—he teaches at Stanford and knows a thing or two about effective communication.
I would recommend reading the book if you want to hone your social and communication skills. However, I’ll continue to share the best frameworks from the book with examples in future newsletter issues. Stay tuned.
Here are a few other frameworks and tips I shared in the past to master the art of public speaking and effective communication:
🚀 Growth Tip
I have a folder on my phone, which I have named ‘Grow 🪴’.
I have organized all my favorite productivity apps that help me Learn + Grow in this folder.
This helps for me:
Find the right app — quickly and easily.
Reminds me of my key value — Growth.
Spend more productive time on my phone.
🤩 Inspiration
Big problems, like a pandemic, come quickly, and everyone talks about them. But good changes, like fewer people dying from malaria every year, happen slowly and quietly, so they don't get as much attention.
Pay attention to good things happening around us.
Anil
May the Peaceful Growth be with you! 🪴
P.S. Many of you requested that I should create a course on optimizing work, life, and learning using my peaceful growth strategies. I'm truly honored, but it’s a lot of work, so I'm still wrestling with this idea.